3 years

1. Why does an entry-level position need 3+ years of experience?
1.為什么一個(gè)入門級(jí)職位需要3年以上工作經(jīng)驗(yàn)？

5 professional references

2. You need 5 professional references?
2.你需要5個(gè)職場(chǎng)人士寫的推薦信？

I graduated, like, yesterday.
我好像是昨天才剛畢業(yè)的。

funny anecdote

3. You want a “funny anecdote” in the body of your email?
3.你想要在電子郵件中寫進(jìn)一個(gè)“奇聞?shì)W事”？

Sure! This one time, at band camp…
當(dāng)然！這次在樂隊(duì)營(yíng)……

Why

4. Why do you need my social security number and drivers license number?
4.為什么你需要我的社會(huì)保險(xiǎn)號(hào)和駕照號(hào)碼？

It freaks me out a little.
這有點(diǎn)讓我抓狂。

Where

5. New job listing that I qualify for? Where?
5.（告訴我）我能勝任的工作？是什么？

Oh it’s a "commission-based" position. Great.
哦，是個(gè)基于傭金的職位。棒極了。

bennies

6. Would I like to know about these awesome bennies? Sure!
6.我想試試這些興奮劑嗎？當(dāng)然！

Not getting my hopes up.
別讓我燃起希望。

auto-response

7. All I get is the auto-response email?
7.我得到的只有自動(dòng)回復(fù)的郵件？

Okay. That’s fine.
好吧，很好。

salary

8. Expected salary?
8.預(yù)期的薪水？

I don’t know, you tell me. Enough for me to eat?
我不知道，你告訴我。夠我吃飯么？

complete

9. Upload my resume AND complete your custom application?
9.為什么我已經(jīng)上傳了我的簡(jiǎn)歷，還要完成你們的申請(qǐng)流程？

It’s the same information, but alright.
還是一樣的老信息，但是好吧。

$0.50

10. Oohh you’re paying $0.50 more than minimum wage?
10.噢，你比最低工資多付給我5分錢？

Cool! I’ll pay off my loans in 100 years or so.
酷！我會(huì)在100年以內(nèi)還清貸款的。

relisted

11. Can I reapply for that position you relisted?
11.我可以重新申請(qǐng)那個(gè)你重新發(fā)布的職位嗎？

Even though you still didn’t respond to me.
即使你還是不回復(fù)我。

?

a position

12. Hi there, I applied for a position last week?
12.嘿，我上周申請(qǐng)了一個(gè)職位？

Just wanted to check in.
只是想報(bào)個(gè)到。

respond

13. Could you please respond to my inquiries?
13.求求你，回應(yīng)一下我的請(qǐng)求吧。

I’ll just wait.
我還是等著吧。

hard

14. Why is this so hard?
14.為什么就這么難呢？

emails

15. No new emails?
15.沒有新郵件？

Okay.
好吧。

What time

16. What time is it?
16.幾點(diǎn)了？

I’ve been completing job applications for 4 hours now. Stimulating.
我已經(jīng)填了4小時(shí)的工作申請(qǐng)表了。加油。

response

17. Is that an actual response??
17.真的是這么回復(fù)的嗎？

Woo-hoo!!!
嗚呼?。?！

available

18. Am I available to talk at 10:30am tomorrow?
18.我明天10:30有沒有空談話？

Hmmm… lemme see… HELL YES!
嗯……我看看……是的！

14 page

19. Complete this 14 page job application?
19.完成這份14頁(yè)的工作申請(qǐng)表？

No problem.
沒問題。

interview

20. Three stages of interviewing?
20.三個(gè)階段的面試？

Sounds good to me.
聽上去不錯(cuò)。

Security

21. Security clearance? Special certificates? Graduate degree?
21.安全檢查？專項(xiàng)認(rèn)證？畢業(yè)學(xué)歷？

I have a cat power on Buzzfeed. I’m kind of a big deal.
我在Buzzfeed上可是有貓勢(shì)力的。我也是個(gè)大人物。

freaking

22. Am I going to be freaking late to this interview?
22.我面試就要遲到了？

work

23. How much will I have to work with others?
23.我還要和別人合作多久?。?/div>

I don’t like others.
我不喜歡別人。

nail

24.Did I nail it?
24.我成功了嗎？

wait

25. So I should just wait for a call back, then?
25.我應(yīng)該就等著回電，是嗎？

Phone’s on, right?
手機(jī)開著呢，對(duì)吧？

all over

26. Do I just need to start all over again?
26.我需要重頭再來(lái)一遍嗎？

*sigh*
哎。