1、Endearing terms
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英語(yǔ)幽默故事:可愛(ài)的稱呼 ?

Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago." ?

Bernie應(yīng)邀來(lái)到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐。在朋友家，Bernie發(fā)現(xiàn)，不管問(wèn)他老婆什么問(wèn)題，Morris總要在每句話的前面加上一些親密的稱呼，象蜜糖，我的愛(ài)人，親愛(ài)的，甜心等等。Bernie對(duì)Morris說(shuō)，“你們夫妻倆真夠親密的，結(jié)婚這么多年了，你還叫她叫得那么親密。”Morris低下頭，小聲地對(duì)Bernie說(shuō)，“老實(shí)跟你說(shuō)吧，三年前我忘記老婆的真名是什么了。”

2、 老虎來(lái)了

Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them. One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?" His friend replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than you."

兩個(gè)男人正在穿過(guò)叢林，突然，一只老虎出現(xiàn)在遠(yuǎn)處，向他們沖來(lái)。 其中的一個(gè)人從包里拿出一雙“耐克”鞋，開(kāi)始穿上。另一個(gè)人驚奇地看著他說(shuō)，“你以為穿上這個(gè)就可以跑得過(guò)老虎嗎？” 他的朋友回答道：“我不用跑得過(guò)它，我只要跑得比你快就行了?！?/div>


3、Lady First

女士?jī)?yōu)先

teacher asked her class: "Is the sentence ' The ox and the cow are in the fields' correct?" Most of the children said: "Yes, it is all right!" And only one little boy said: "No, it is not correct. The lady must be mentioned first."

一位老師問(wèn)班上的學(xué)生：”公牛和母牛在田里“這個(gè)句子對(duì)嗎？” 大多數(shù)學(xué)生回答說(shuō)：“對(duì)，一點(diǎn)不錯(cuò)?！?只有一個(gè)小男孩說(shuō)：“不對(duì)，應(yīng)該先說(shuō)女士?！?/div>
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