躺槍否?17個(gè)證據(jù)你已成宇宙黃金剩斗士
作者:滬江英語
來源:赫芬頓郵報(bào)
2015-02-12 09:00
A Warm Embrace
Feel like you've been single and ready to mingle for so long, you're deserving of some kind of endurance award?
感覺自己一直就是只單身狗,時(shí)刻為交往而準(zhǔn)備著,真該給你頒發(fā)耐力獎(jiǎng)了!
Hey, you just might be. Below, 17 signs you have officially out-singled all other single people in the universe.
嘿!可能你就是個(gè)單身狗,以下17項(xiàng)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)可以證明你比世界上所有的單身狗更單身。
Your idea of a warm embrace looks a little something like this.
你覺得溫暖的擁抱貌似只能這副樣子了。
Jealousy
You're jealous of these hand-holding gummy bears.
這些牽手的小熊橡皮糖都能招來你的羨慕妒忌恨。
No Emergency Contact
Your emergency contact is depressing. Real depressing.
你的緊急聯(lián)系人郁悶了,真的郁悶了。
Fake Girlfriend
You go to the trouble of staging selfies with your fake girlfriend.
只好麻煩假女友登臺配合自己演一出戲。
Don't Even Try To Fake
You don't even go to the trouble of faking a girlfriend anymore.
就連給自己偽裝一個(gè)女友的麻煩都省了。
Aged To Much
You've aged decades in the time it's taken to find The One. (Hey, at least you'll always have dear old dad.)
找對象蹉跎了歲月。(嘿,還好有親愛的老爸陪在身邊。)
A Mess
This drawing accurately illustrates your "love life."
這幅畫真切生動(dòng)地展現(xiàn)了你的“愛情生活”。
No One Care
You realize nothing brings the boys to the yard. Not even milkshakes.
就別說準(zhǔn)備好一杯奶昔等你了,家里連個(gè)人影兒都木有啊。
Mummy's Good Boy
Forget your mom. Even your Coke cans are starting to dole out unsolicited relationship advice.
別再做聽媽媽話的乖孩子了!去主動(dòng)爭取自己的幸福吧。
Buy A Pillow
You give serious thought to buying this pillow.
你真該好好考慮買個(gè)這樣的枕頭。
Food Is Your True Love
You reinvent this romantic photo trend to incorporate your one true love: food.
為你的真愛(食物)拍一張純浪漫的照片。
Chage Furniture
You swap out your old furniture for pieces more accommodating to your current living situation.
更換一下舊家具,增添一下現(xiàn)代生活氣息。
Food Song
You start dedicating your favorite love songs to foodstuff.
邊做美食邊聽那首自己最愛聽的情歌。
In Love
You look for new creative ways to pretend you're soooo in love.
找個(gè)新創(chuàng)意偽裝成你正沐浴愛河之中。
Date Food
Your "dinner with bae" posts on Instagram look something like this.
你發(fā)的搞笑進(jìn)餐照片看起來是這個(gè)樣子的。
Too Tired To Love
You've truly exhausted every last avenue in your attempt to find someone to date.
走在每一條大街上都盼著走個(gè)桃花運(yùn),最后卻只剩下走得精疲力竭的自己而已。
Nutell Lover
Until finally, you just give up and accept Nutella as the love of your life.
最后,你放棄追求那憧憬的愛情生活,繼續(xù)與巧克力過著甜蜜的愛情生活。