No. 1: Avoid a supervisor-supervisee relationship.
首先是避免在上下級(jí)之間發(fā)展戀情。

Especially for the person in the supervisor’s seat, such a relationship is “criminally stupid,” says McKenna. “You might as well put a sign on your forehead that says, ‘Kick me here.’” McKenna acts mainly as a defense lawyer. In Brin’s case it’s not clear he broke this rule, given that he’s outside the company and doesn’t officially supervise his new romantic partner.
尤其對(duì)處在上級(jí)位置上的那個(gè)人來說，這樣的關(guān)系“非常愚蠢可能招惹上官司”，麥凱納說道。她說，“這無異于在腦門上貼了一個(gè)標(biāo)志，上面寫著‘朝這兒踢’?！丙渼P納主要做被告方的辯護(hù)律師。就布林的情況而言，考慮到他不在公司內(nèi)部，在職務(wù)上沒有與新戀人形成上下級(jí)關(guān)系，因此尚不清楚他是否違反了該規(guī)則。

Still Edward Hernstadt, a plaintiff-side employment lawyer in New York, agrees with McKenna. An employee can make a claim that she (it’s usually a she) wouldn’t have dated the boss if she hadn’t felt compelled. “The supervisor will say, ‘I just asked you to go on a date,’” says Hernstadt. “But the subordinate will say, ‘I felt I couldn’t say no.’”
然而，紐約原告方勞動(dòng)法律師愛德華?赫恩斯塔德同意麥凱納的看法。員工可能會(huì)聲稱如果不是感覺受到了脅迫，她（通常是女性）是不會(huì)與老板約會(huì)的。赫恩斯塔德說，“她的上級(jí)會(huì)說，‘我只是問你是否愿意與我約會(huì)?！?dāng)事人會(huì)說，‘我感到不能夠說不’?！?/div>

If a supervisor and a subordinate just can’t resist each other, McKenna recommends that they sign what she calls a “cupid contract.”
如果上下級(jí)之間彼此吸引且不能自拔，麥凱納就建議雙方簽署一份“丘比特合約”。

They should spell out in writing the fact that both are engaging in a consensual relationship. If the company has a sexual harassment policy, they should make it clear they understand the rules.
他們應(yīng)當(dāng)白紙黑字地寫清楚：彼此兩情相悅。如果公司有關(guān)于性騷擾的制度，他們還應(yīng)當(dāng)寫明自己知曉這些規(guī)則。

Helaine Olen agrees. “Set some ground rules you can use if the relationship flames out,” she advises. “It’s like a prenup for an office romance.”
赫萊茵-奧倫也認(rèn)同這一點(diǎn)。她建議，“訂立一些基本規(guī)則，一旦關(guān)系惡化可以用到。對(duì)辦公室戀情來說這就像婚前協(xié)議一樣。”

Olen also suggests that the senior partner in the relationship step up and report the romance to the human resources department. In so doing the supervisor should volunteer to take the hit if the company decides the pair should no longer work together.
奧倫還建議，上下級(jí)戀情中作為上級(jí)的一方應(yīng)當(dāng)主動(dòng)站出來，向人力資源部門報(bào)備。在這樣做的過程中，如果公司認(rèn)為兩人不應(yīng)再一同工作，上級(jí)的一方應(yīng)該主動(dòng)提出離開。

It’s far preferable to find someone outside your department to date. Connie Thanasoulis-Cerrachio, a career coach who has worked with companies including Merrill Lynch, Pfizer and Citigroup, recommends looking for love at office philanthropic activities and social events like softball games rather than in the neighboring cubicle.
在自己部門以外的地方尋找心儀對(duì)象就可取得多了。曾經(jīng)與美林證券、輝瑞制藥和花旗銀行合作的職業(yè)教練康妮-薩納索利斯·切拉基奧建議在公司的慈善活動(dòng)以及像壘球游戲等社交活動(dòng)中尋找愛情，而不是盯著身邊的同事。

Another piece of perhaps obvious but valuable advice: Pause before you plunge.
另一個(gè)顯而易見但非常寶貴的忠告是：在一頭扎進(jìn)去之前請(qǐng)三思。

“Stop and think about yourself in relation to the other person,” advises Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington and the author of 16 books on dating and romance.
“停下來想想自己和對(duì)方的關(guān)系?！比A盛頓大學(xué)社會(huì)學(xué)教授佩珀-施瓦茨建議道，她著有16本婚戀作品。

“If you’re in heavy lust, you’ve got to slow down.” McKenna agrees. “Think about the fact that 50% of marriages don’t make it,” she says. “The batting average for other relationships is much worse.”
“如果你用情很深，你就不得不放慢節(jié)奏。”麥凱納表示認(rèn)同?！跋胂?0%的婚姻都不能走到最后，”她說，“其他關(guān)系的平均成功率就更低了?！?/div>

One more piece of advice: Consider how you would feel if you lost your job.
還有一條建議：想想如果失去工作，你的感受會(huì)是如何。

Everyone who has experienced heartbreak knows that proximity to an ex can be unbearable. All too often, say experts, failed office romances result in one person leaving the job–willfully or not.
任何經(jīng)歷過分手的時(shí)候人都知道，與前任戀人抬頭不見低頭見是多么難以忍受的一件事。專家們稱，辦公室戀情告吹常常會(huì)導(dǎo)致一個(gè)人離開公司，無論是否出于本意。

“The possible consequences here are not just the loss of the person you’re gaga over,” says Schwartz. “It could mean the loss of your livelihood.” Brin obviously doesn’t run that risk and it seems his new romantic partner will also be safe, given that she doesn’t report directly to him. But for the rest of us, it’s wise to keep in mind the potential fallout from an office liaison.“
這里可能出現(xiàn)的結(jié)果是，你失去的不僅僅是讓你為之傾倒的那個(gè)人，”施瓦茨說道，“可能還有你的生計(jì)?！憋@然，布林不用冒這個(gè)風(fēng)險(xiǎn)，而且考慮到他的新戀人不必直接向他匯報(bào)工作，貌似她也比較安全。但是對(duì)我們其他人來說，牢牢記住辦公室戀情對(duì)事業(yè)的潛在影響不失為明智之舉。