Why It’s OK to Ditch Work Social Events
為什么我們可以不參加工作中的社交活動(dòng)

Maybe this is the case at your company. Or, maybe you’re looking to make friends in a new role and, every time you miss an event, you’re convinced that you’re losing a prime opportunity to lock those relationships down.
也許你的公司就是這種情況?；蛘?，也許你剛換了新職位，想要結(jié)交朋友，每當(dāng)你錯(cuò)過(guò)一個(gè)活動(dòng)，都會(huì)覺(jué)得自己失去了一個(gè)鞏固關(guān)系的絕佳機(jī)會(huì)。

But you shouldn’t ever feel like you have to make friends at the office or attend work social events at any cost.
但你不該覺(jué)得自己必須要在辦公室交朋友，或者要不惜一切代價(jià)參加社交活動(dòng)。

Sure, you could keep dragging yourself to events that you have no real interest in, but keeping this charade up is exhausting and not always productive. As long as you’re happy with the rest of your job, you feel respected, your ideas are heard, you enjoy the work you’re doing—it’s OK to let this one thing go.
當(dāng)然，你可以繼續(xù)逼著自己參加不感興趣的活動(dòng)，但一直這樣偽裝很累，而且并不總有成效。只要你對(duì)工作的其他方面滿意，你感到受尊重，你的想法被聆聽(tīng)，你享受所做的工作，這件事情順其自然就好。

Whether you’re three months or three years in, introverted or extroverted, looking to make friends or not, socializing with your co-workers should be something you choose to do. Having a good relationship with the people you work with is important for clear communication, productivity, and overall job satisfaction, but that relationship can simply be an in-the-office, professional kind.
無(wú)論你入職三個(gè)月還是三年，內(nèi)向或外向，想不想要交朋友，與同事交往應(yīng)該是你可以選擇的事情。與合作伙伴建立良好的關(guān)系對(duì)清晰的溝通、生產(chǎn)力的提高和整體工作的滿意度非常重要，但這種關(guān)系可以簡(jiǎn)化成一種工作上的、專業(yè)上的關(guān)系。

Yes, there are times when activities will be heavily encouraged, if not mandatory, like offsites, retreats, or networking events. And in these moments, you’re maybe sacrificing more than just social status by not participating—you’re missing out on a chance to get to know your colleagues, build a stronger team, or even do your job well. But most companies ultimately won’t force you to do something you truly don’t feel comfortable doing.
是的，有時(shí)候人們會(huì)被鼓勵(lì)參加一些活動(dòng)，如果不是強(qiáng)制性的，比如擴(kuò)展活動(dòng)、團(tuán)建度假或社交活動(dòng)。這時(shí)候，你不參加，除了喪失社會(huì)地位之外 - 錯(cuò)還過(guò)了一個(gè)了解同事、建設(shè)一個(gè)更強(qiáng)團(tuán)隊(duì)、甚至做好本職工作的機(jī)會(huì)。但多數(shù)公司最終都不會(huì)強(qiáng)迫你去做確實(shí)覺(jué)得不舒服的事情。

More importantly, the best bosses and co-workers (and work friends) understand that certain things come first, whether it’s family or hobbies or personal preferences. Chances are, there have also been plenty of instances when they’ve had to miss out on a team activity because something else was more important.
更重要的是，最好的老板和同事（以及工作上的朋友）明白有些事情更重要，無(wú)論是家庭，愛(ài)好還是個(gè)人偏好?？赡苡泻芏嗲闆r，他們不得不放棄參加團(tuán)隊(duì)活動(dòng)，因?yàn)橛衅渌匾氖虑椤?/div>

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How to Get Out of Your Next Work Social Event
如何擺脫下一個(gè)工作社交活動(dòng)

Here’s the thing: I’m all too familiar with the difference between knowing you’re allowed to say “no” to work social events and actually having to break the news to your co-workers that you’re going to skip one.
重點(diǎn)來(lái)了：我很了解兩種情形的區(qū)別。一種是你有權(quán)對(duì)社交活動(dòng)說(shuō)“不”，另一種是你要委婉地跟你的同事解釋這次活動(dòng)參加不了。

Sometimes peer pressure sets in and guilts you into attending, and you’re stuck doing something you really don’t want to do. While I can’t guarantee that won’t happen—some people might just continue to pester you or nag you about being a recluse—know that you can dodge their invites respectfully while still keeping the relationships intact.
有時(shí)候，來(lái)自同伴的壓力會(huì)讓你覺(jué)得不參加有負(fù)罪感，并且你會(huì)陷入窘境，去做一件真心不想做的事情。我不能保證不會(huì)有這種情況——有些人可能會(huì)繼續(xù)纏著你或不停地嘮叨不參加集體活動(dòng)有多不好。而你要知道的是，你既可以禮貌地謝絕對(duì)方的邀請(qǐng)，又能不傷感情。

The key in any rejection is to not make it personal. Instead, focus on your decision and why you can’t or won’t join this time. For example, you can say, “Sounds like fun! Unfortunately, something’s come up: [family emergency or conflict]. Pencil me in for the next one?” or “You know I love hanging with you all, but if I’m being completely honest, [activity] isn’t my thing. I hope you have a blast, though!”
任何拒絕的關(guān)鍵都是不要主觀化。相反，把重點(diǎn)放在你的決定或?yàn)槭裁床荒芑虿粫?huì)參加此次會(huì)議上。比如，你可以說(shuō)，“聽(tīng)起來(lái)很有趣！不過(guò)，我臨時(shí)有事：[家中有急事或鬧別扭了]。我下一次參加，幫我記上啊！”或著“你知道的，我喜歡跟你們一起出去，但坦白講，[活動(dòng)]我不感興趣。不過(guò)，我希望你玩兒嗨一點(diǎn)！”

Or, you can just skip the specifics, thank them, and politely decline: “Thanks for inviting me! I can’t make it, but have a great time!” or “Appreciate you including me, but I already have plans.” In most cases, they’ll accept your rejection and move on.
或者，你可以跳過(guò)具體細(xì)節(jié)，謝謝他們，然后禮貌地拒絕：“謝謝你邀請(qǐng)我！我去不了，你們玩兒得開(kāi)心點(diǎn)！”或著“謝謝你邀請(qǐng)我，但我已經(jīng)約了別的事?！倍鄶?shù)情況下，對(duì)方會(huì)接受你的推辭，然后繼續(xù)做他們的。

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翻譯：Claire